Sometimes it can be easy to know when you are ready to have kids. Or when you are ready to “try again” to have more kids. We have all met those people who were able to say things like, “we will have two kids, and that’s it!” and sure enough, that’s what they do. And some of the rest of us aren’t so decisive. It took me ages to decide when I was ready to start a family. It was easier to jump on the gun for the other pregnancies, but that first one took me a while.

Now I’m faced with the question, am I done having kids? Again, for some of you, this might be the easiest question you have ever answered. I applaud you if you can confidently proclaim that you’re done. But perhaps the are a few of you, like me, wondering where you stand.

Here are some things to ask yourself. Why do you want a baby? If you answer because everyone else I know is pregnant, you might consider holding off. But if you say to yourself that having a baby is the greatest joy you could imagine and you love having them around, you could be on to something. Can you afford it? Of course, you could make things work, lots of us do. However, going from two kids to three for example, can require a new vehicle. Logistically, can you have another child? Is there room? Does your husband want one? You are a team and really need to be on the same page here for sure.

My last advice, is that if you are unsure and have a young child at home reevaluate on your youngest child’s birthday each year. It is amazing how much just a year can make in this decision. With each passing year kids grow more and more independent leaving you more energy for babies. If that’s the plan. Most importantly, I would recommend going with your gut. Mommy gut has served you well before, and it will again here too. As for me, I’m still on the fence for now. But then my youngest is only 9 months. I’ll give myself a bit more time.

-Stephanie Wright